[personal profile] icecreamemperor
In the future-and-therefore-also-past event of inventing a time machine, having first done my duty as a Hegelian Empiricist and murdered Hitler, I will then proceed in functionally-instantaneous progression to also kill the founder of Harley Davidson motors and the inventor of the car alarm. By then I will be quite an expert on time-travel-murder, so maintaining the extinction of their inevitable surrogates should not be difficult.

For on some days John Cage is enough to save me, but on other days I must spend thirty minutes on a Skytrain car that squeals loudly enough to suspect that it is causing irreversible hearing loss to everyone on board, and upon finally emerging to the pastoral white-noise of a merely urban city be immediately passed by a motorcyclist, only to detour off the main street and walk past not one but two constantly-honking cars -- and on those days I wish sincere, instantaneous death on all those who contribute their truly superfluous noise to the world, or worse still somehow contrive to profit off making others the vessels of said noise.

This is a real moral failing, for which I have no apology, and should anyone in the future be thinking about visiting upon me any sort of limited-but-cosmic power, I do hope they read this livejournal entry and reconsider their decision.

Date: 2016-03-23 04:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] taxi.livejournal.com
Realizing I am not the one to offer credible sympathy: The world needs to acknowledge the fact that the car-alarm experiment has failed. It deters nothing and nobody ever believes it has anything to do with a car being stolen, because it never does. (Or maybe the world has acknowledged this, but there's still a ton of old alarmed cars out on the road?)

Date: 2016-03-23 07:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icecreamemperor.livejournal.com
No, new cars all have car alarms, as far as I can tell -- it's not even an option you pay for. And ever since someone got the extra-foolish idea of wiring the alarm to the horn, rather than having to pay for some different-sounding thing, it's extra terrible because now the sound of a car horn is suffering the same evacuation-of-meaning as the car alarm itself. You hear a car horn and it's like 'well, either there is an immediate danger in traffic, demanding my full attention orrrr... someone locked their car.' As a cyclist this drives me insane, above and beyond the association with honky car alarms.

I certainly was thinking 'well I should put some sort of caveat in here about NOISE ART' but it seemed unnecessary to complicate the rant -- but suffice to say there is nothing unnecessary or gratuitous about ART whereas there certainly is about motorcycles specifically designed to make extra noise.



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